I was admonished by a friend about my lack of posting in the past few days. Sigh....so here it goes.
Sex, sex and more sex and yes, the Good Doctor is the only one that comes close to making me howl with delight. I rather miss those lovely nights of snuggling close to you-know-who and just being happy to wake up in the morning chattering. We both give good morning chatter. He was great that way. Still, snuggles and hugs and tender kisses. I keep thinking that these things are going to continually evade me. I haven't had a real affectionate boyfriend since the days of Claude, Sakis and Scotty. Those guys really treated me like a nice girl and we did the hand holding and nicey nicey stuff.
All boyfriends since then (with the exception of Michael) was all about sex, sex, sex. I mean, yeah, I did cool things with Seth but he goes far out of his way to be arrogant alpha male unless his emotions are shattered and then he needs hugs. Ummm, but what about moi???? sigh..........So, I guess, I'm going to be celibate for awhile. This sex without love thing is
bullshit, yess, this sex without love thing is bullshit
So, I supposed to get tickets to see the dead tomorrow at Jones and its going to be raining and I think John is going to be pouty but I don't care. I should've just went on my own and gave the extra ticket away
I have too many secrets and at first I felt privileged and now it just feels like a weight. My therapy session was way harsh. She wasn't mean but to bring things into focus is not what I want right now even though its what I need.
I'm getting ready for the RNC. lots of volunteer work to be done and I'm totally game. I hope things are not too volatile. I'm not here in spirit, only in the flesh. I have no idea where my spirit is. Probably hiding until I stop messing with bad apples and give some much needed love to myself.
ahhhhh, it did feel good to let all that out. Thanks to the doctor for reminding me of what I'm supposed to be doing. and not necessarily whom I'm doing!!!! More to come later!!!